Marriageology: The Art and Science of Staying Together (Hardcover)
A smart and concise guide to staying together that draws on scientific findings, expert advice, and years in the marital trenches to explain why marriage is better for your health, your finances, your kids, and your happiness
Like you, probably, Belinda Luscombe would rather have had her eyes put out than read a book about marriage; they all seemed full of advice that was obvious, useless, or bad. Plus they were boring. But after covering the relationship beat for Time magazine for ten years, she realized there was a surprisingly upbeat and little-known story to tell about the benefits of staying together for the long haul. Casting a witty, candid, and probing eye on the latest behavioral science, Luscombe has written a fresh and persuasive report on the state of our unions, how they’ve changed from the marriages of our parents’ era, and what those changes mean for the happiness of this most intimate and important of our relationships.
In Marriageology Luscombe examines the six major fault lines that can fracture contemporary marriages, also known as the F-words: familiarity, fighting, finances, family, fooling around, and finding help. She presents facts, debunks myths, and provides a fascinating mix of research, anecdotes, and wisdom from a wide range of approaches—from how properly dividing up chores can result in a better sex life to the benefits of fighting with your spouse (though not in the car) to whether or not to tell your partner that you lost $70,000. (The last one is from firsthand experience.)
Marriageology offers simple, actionable, maybe even borderline fun techniques and tips to try, whether the relationship in question is about to conk out or just needs a little grease and an oil change. The best news of all is that sticking together is easier than it looks.
Praise for Marriageology
“Drawn from what she learned covering the relationship beat for Time, Luscombe’s how-not-to-split-up manual is witty and wise.”—People
“People are still getting married, and this book is here to help. . . . A warm and companionable volume . . . [Luscombe has a] wry touch, a gift for scene-setting, and an endearingly even temper.”—The New Yorker
“Few things are more important than the quality of our relationships—and especially the one we build with our life partners. Belinda Luscombe has written a smart and funny book to help anyone work toward a stronger and more fulfilling marriage.”—Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and founder of LeanIn and OptionB
About the Author
Belinda Luscombe is an award-winning Time magazine journalist and essayist. Her work has also appeared in The New York Times, Sports Illustrated, and Vogue. She won the Council on Contemporary Families Media Award for her reporting on marriage. She and her husband have been realizing how deeply unsuitable they are for each other but still figuring it out somehow for almost thirty years, often while being laughed at by their two children.
“I’d recommend this book to anyone who is married. Or thinking of getting married. Or knows anyone who is married. Or who is simply interested in getting along with other human beings. Belinda Luscombe combines science, memoir, and sharp wit in this fascinating and useful book. She takes on myths about everything from soul mates to finance to going to bed angry (her advice: Do it!). Skip the gravy boat and give this as a gift to all your engaged friends.”—A. J. Jacobs, author of The Year of Living Biblically
“If I could talk about marriage to my wife with the intelligence and humor that Belinda Luscombe does in this book, I’d be having a lot more sex.”—Joel Stein, author of Man Made
“This little book is absolutely delightful. Belinda Luscombe combines what she’s learned in ten years of covering relationships for Time, plus behavioral science, research, and real-life stories, to reveal a recipe to enrich your health, finances, kids, and happiness: Marriage! Marriageology is a funny, smart book full of hope and suggestions and surprising discoveries (‘fight with your spouse but not in the car’). This is not just for us marrieds but for anyone getting married, thinking about getting married, getting remarried, or raising people who are going to get married.”—Jen Hatmaker, bestselling author of Of Mess and Moxie and host of the For the Love podcast
“Staying together in the age of Tinder is no mean feat. Thank goodness Belinda Luscombe’s wise, funny, scientifically rigorous book is here to improve our odds. Henceforth, exiting the chapel, couples should be pelted with copies of Marriageology instead of rice.”—Ada Calhoun, author of Wedding Toasts I’ll Never Give
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